Want to grab a coffee?

The most common phrase that anyone will face at some point in his life…

Let’s face it, we’ve all been in a situation where someone invites us for coffee and we’re not sure if we want to go. Saying no can be tough, but sometimes it’s necessary. If you keep declining the invitation, the person will likely get the hint and stop asking. But, if they don’t, you may have to bite the bullet and say yes.There is no way these people will stop harassing you, till they see you. By saying yes, you do not condemn yourself to an hour of pure boredom. The following advice will help you spend this “cup of coffee” time with ease.

First, it is very important to arrange this “coffee” with as many friends as possible. The larger the crowd the easier will be to go unnoticed and smooth this “dull” experience.

coffee introverts

When to arrive and conversation tips

You should arrive with a small delay; 10 minutes should do the job. The earlier we get there, the earlier we will get out of there as well. However, a small disadvantage exists. If a large group of people is expected to show up, then if you arrive 10 minutes late, you should expect probably to hang out with the more annoying crowd as the individuals that are more eager for the meeting, arrive first. Till the others get there, you should also expect to be interrogated heavily as there will be no other victim there.

In order to avoid any personal questions, you should start chatting with the person sitting next to you. The topics of conversation can vary according to the crowd. It’s good to remember what is one’s person interest and ask them exactly about that. The conversation will get going easily and the main speaker will not be you. You just should pay attention and ask follow up questions to show interest. If you cannot find a topic, then you should go for more general areas of interest.

Time to leave

As time goes by, the main question is when is the right time to leave? If the coffee is not turned out to be pleasant (as you of course expected, since you are with a person you wanted to avoid in the first place) the right time to leave is about 40 to 50 minutes from the time you got there. It is enough time to make yourself noticeable, share your news and do your duty.

The way to get out is quite simple. You should say that you have to go over a friend’s house to grab a book or a piece of equipment you left there, and you cannot be late. Generally, you have to find an excuse that includes someone who is waiting for you. This way it’s harder for the others to make you stay longer.

The basic rules when you get invited for a “coffee” are:

  1. Always arrange a coffee with as many friends as possible so as to be easier to leave without ruining the party.
  2. Arrive 10 minutes after the scheduled time.
  3. The conversations should include to general topics or the other person’s main interests. 
  4. It is acceptable to leave after 40 minutes.
  5. The reason to leave should be linked with another engagement you may have with someone else that is waiting for you and you cannot bail out.

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